I won't break out the Barnesy tunes this Australia Day
Folks, at the risk of being booted out of this country, I'm going to admit Australia Day isn't celebrated in a big way here at Bray Manor.
I understand New Zealand is nice this time of year.
Anyway, on a sliding scale, Australia Day festivities fall below Christmas, Easter, Mother's Day and Anzac Day but ranks higher than Father's Day, May Day and the Queen's Birthday.
Apparently, my birthday doesn't count because it's not a public holiday; yet.
So today you won't find me waving a plastic, Chinese-made Aussie flag and parading about the yard in my thongs, budgie smugglers, zinc cream and towelling hat with a boxing kangaroo towel draped over my shoulders, a stubby in one hand and a meat pie in the other, while yodelling along to Land Down Under and Khe Sanh.
That's because I'm at work and this sort of activity is frowned upon; especially the budgie smugglers.
But Australia is a tough country to love.
A simple stroll through the bush or a paddle at the beach can be an exercise in death defiance. And there are bits of this wide, brown land that I'm never going to be particularly fond of. Especially the bits getting wider and browner.
Crushing droughts are followed by biblical deluges, so before you can say "Struth it's damp!" we're floating downstream on our roofs surrounded by the carcasses of animals who died of thirst.
Still, I am genuinely grateful to be living in a pretty amazing part of the world.
While things could be better, they could also be much worse.
And this is reflected in the beaming faces of all the new Australians who will officially take the Ocker Oath today.
Many come from countries where all the underground resources are tapped out, the factories have closed, the population are doing wonders with trotters, hooves and cabbage at tea time and their major export appears to be desperate, young people.
They, and we, really are living in the Lucky Country. But I'm still not going to make a song and dance about it.
Find Greg Bray at gregbraywriter.word press.com or Facebook: Greg Bray - Writer